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The Ugliest King

by Morbid Footnote

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1.
Phillip the Handsome, Joanna of Castile Copulate did they, six children did they yield Three of the spawn, here's what they've done Deformation of genes through kissing cousins Five generations Consanguinity (???) Phillip the Second of Spain (married his niece!) Phillip the Third of Spain (his second cousin!) Phillip the Fourth of Spain (married his niece!) Together they had the ugliest king! The politics of inbreeding!
2.
no me gusta 02:16
At long last An heir is born May Cherubim and Seraphim Rain sweet meats upon you Dios mios! No! Dios mios! Believe this is my son? Oh holy ghost, what have I done, this Tangled mass, travesty, My paternal legacy, oh No me gusta No me gusta No me gusta tu nariz No me gusta tu boca No me gusta tu cabeza No me gusta tu todo
3.
Short, lame, epileptic Senile and completely Bald before 35 Always on the verge of death But repeatedly Baffled Christendom By continuing To live ahhhhhh Couldn't talk until he’s 4 Couldn't walk until he’s 8 An unbroken stream of calamaties His rule will devastate unable to chew Refusing to die Continuing to live
4.
The ugliest king! Waring with France 12000 dead per year During his short reign 2 million Spaniards... muerte! Crop failures Earthquakes Epidemics General malaise The ugliest king!
5.
My first wife died And how I cried Within 3 months I have my new bride Wedding night, something’s wrong Erectile dysfunction Premature ejaculation Doomed to never have a son
6.
auto-da-fe 01:49
A fine day for a witch hunt Witchfinder General at my side The Holy Office, rack and thumbscrews Man of God who flays your hide Fuego! Twenty-one people are dying Twenty-one people are dying Twenty-one people are dying Twenty-one people are dead! Flesh is burning Heretics screaming The crowd is booing Most amusing
7.
el hechizado 01:15
Hoy necessito Exorcismo El Hechizado Yech! Louis XIV The riots in Madrid Louis XIV And the riots in Madrid Consign the report to the flame We will not be laid with blame The Lord’s work, not a game Forced to kill before we save Archbishop of Toldeo! Duke of Anjou!
8.
November 1st 1700 Charles II of Spain Is found dead His heart the size of a grain of pepper Not a single drop of blood in his body His lungs were corroded His intestines were putrid He had a single testicle Which was black as carbon And his head was Full of water And his head was Full of water Having no son or daughter The line ends with him, Charles II

about

ALBUM RELEASED ON NOVEMBER 1st, 2012 - THE 312TH ANNIVERSARY OF CHARLES II'S DEATH!

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Maart and Yuk met in the Metal Archives forums and decided to make the best / first / last / only death metal album dedicated to the misdeeds and mutatations of everyone's favorite malformed monarch - Charles II of Spain.

From Wikipedia:

"Dating to approximately the year 1550, outbreeding in Charles II's lineage had ceased (see also pedigree collapse). From then on, all his ancestors were in one way or another descendants of Joanna the Mad and Philip I of Castile, and among these just the royal houses of Spain, Austria and Bavaria. Charles II's genome was actually more homozygous than that of an average child whose parents are siblings.[2] He was born physically and mentally disabled, and disfigured. Possibly through affliction with mandibular prognathism, he was unable to chew. His tongue was so large that his speech could barely be understood, and he frequently drooled. It has been suggested that he suffered from the endocrine disease acromegaly, or his inbred lineage may have led to a combination of rare genetic disorders such as combined pituitary hormone deficiency and distal renal tubular acidosis."

This album was constructed from recordings by Maart in Amsterdam which were transferred via the magic of the Internet to Baltimore, MD. Yuk's brother Sky performed extensive research into the life of the king and turned up a treasure trove of lyric ideas. Yuk's pal (and bandmate in Asthma Castle) J vomited forth additional vocals of the brutal variety, perfectly complimenting Mr. Yuk's demented bellowing. And finally, Durv was there to record the screams and mix the insanity.

The next album will be out sometime in 2013, featuring another unsavory character ripped from the pages of European history... another... MORBID FOOTNOTE!

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FOLLOW THE "RECOMMENDATIONS" LINK ON THE RIGHT TO HEAR MAART AND YUK'S OTHER AWESOME BANDS!

credits

released November 1, 2012

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Morbid Footnote

Historically-Themed Trans-Atlantic Death Metal Fiasco!

Maarten Houwink ten Cate - guitars, bass, drums, riff smithing
Yuk - vocals
J - additional vocals
Sky - research
Durv - mixing

Featuring members in Amsterdam and Baltimore, MD, USA.
... more

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